A Scrivener's Guide To
The Worst Holiday
Don't give anyone these gifts.
I mean it!
The Sushi Clock
(I'm speechless, folks.)
(Yes, but will it bring
Tinkerbelle back to life?.)
(The blast from the past
that just won't die.)
The Blender Phone
(I'm not even
going to ask why.)
packaged fruit cake
(probably as old as Methuselah)
If you're unlucky enough to receive any of these gifts,
run, don't walk, to the nearest Goodwill Drop Off Center...
When the "gifter" asks why such a fabulous item isn't prominently displayed in your home, just say that you took it to show your family over the holidays and
A. forgot to bring it home.
B. your grandmother cried when you tried to pack it for the trip home.
C. everyone was fighting over it, so you only use it when you're home alone.
Psst! Don't forget to include the retail value of each... er... gift when you do your taxes.
A Scrivener's Guide To Holiday Films