Monday, June 05, 2006

To The (Laughing) Stocks With You: Lutheran Witches In Ohio

Can this really be happening in the 21st century of the common era?

Ohio, what the hell is going on?
Pastor accused of witchcraft


AUSTINTOWN-— It may not be focused on the horrors that befall college students in some creepy woods, but Mahoning County now has its own "Blair Witch Project,"’ complete with elements of witchcraft and intrigue.

The Rev. Mark Musser of Austintown is suing Emmanuel Lutheran Church from which he was fired on claims that he was involved in witchcraft.

"For an ordained minister, these are very serious accusations," said attorney Matt Blair, who is representing the pastor in the witchcraft lawsuit project.

"Webster's Dictionary defines witchcraft as practicing the dark arts, and the dark arts are defined as being in league with the devil,"’ Blair said.

According to a lawsuit filed by Musser in Mahoning County Court, Elder Dominic Monroe of Boardman came into a Bible study group and announced that Musser was being fired for practicing witchcraft.

"‘Apparently, Monroe accused (Musser) of manipulating the congregation, of casting a spell on them,"Blair said.

First of all, Webster's needs to clarify its definition of witchcraft.

One entry found for witchcraft.
Main Entry: witch·craft
Pronunciation: 'wich-"kraft
Function: noun
1 a : the use of sorcery or magic b : communication with the devil or with a familiar
2 : an irresistible influence or fascination

As for these Ohio Lutherans...

To the stocks with all of you!

Laughing Stocks, that is.

I have to wonder, though...

Would Pastor Musser float if put to the test?

Best bar bet in the world: Delilah didn't do it.
Judges 16:19--


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