Snarky Sermon on the Blog: The Pope's Sticky Limbo Situation

Pope to announce limbo does not exist

By Daniel Patrick Sheehan

To Catholics of generations past, baptism wasn't something to be deferred until a convenient time, because the souls of infants who died without it were thought to be consigned to something other than heaven. Limbo.

Not quite heaven, not nearly hell, it was regarded as a place of eternal happiness that fell just short of paradise, reserved for unbaptized children and righteous souls who lived before Christ.

It was a widespread and influential teaching for centuries. But Pope Benedict XVI is expected today to reject the concept, endorsing the conclusions of a theological commission that said unbaptized children who die before reaching the age of reason go to heaven.

St. Augustine, an influential church father, theorized the existence of limbo in the fifth century, when entry to heaven was thought to be restricted to baptized Christians. Nobody wanted to believe God would send innocent souls to hell, so the saint theorized the existence of limbo.

"I call it `Paradise Park,'" said Larry Chapp, a professor of theology at DeSales University in Center Valley, evoking a kind of gilded Disneyland as he described the concept of a haven on the fringe of heaven

OK. Sounds like a good plan for Benedict, who lead the Doctrine of the Faith (formerly known as "The Inquisition"-- yep, those guys in red with the torture tool box) and recently pissed off the entire Muslim world, doesn't it?

But, of course, I have a question:

If there's no Limbo, where did Jesus go immediately after dying on the cross if he didn't fly into Limbo and free the Old Testament patriarchs?

Oh, yeah. Benedict is only deleting the Children's Limbo from church history-- not the Limbus Patrum, the Limbo of the fathers.

I guess Benedict thinks the faithful are too stupid or too cowardly to question committee-inspired papal edicts.

Thus Endeth Today's Sermon.

Go forth today and ask yourself: Since the Church did not deem sexual abuse by its clergy a matter worthy of punishment in this world, is Benedict paving their way to heaven too?

Think about it.

I mean it, damn it!

Best bar bet in the world: Delilah didn't do it.
Judges 16:19-- And she made him (Samson) sleep upon her knees; and she called for a man, and she caused him to shave off the seven locks of his head.