Thursday, August 16, 2007

Vacationing Bush To Staff: "Would You Die For Me?"

As a Texan, I can tell you honestly that the Texas heat in August can kill you. If you're the slightest bit dehydrated or not in tip-top shape, even doing something simple like running errands can do you in. Jogging in 104 degree heat is just Pure D stupid.

Forget mad dogs and Englishmen...

But don't forget when you read this Steven King-esque account: George "Bad Knees" Bush doesn't jog anymore. And the Bush family has had several skin cancer scares.

Bush Leads Aides on Sweaty Ranch Run

Before you get all worried, that headline would have you believe that Bush took part in this stupid exercise. He didn't.

CRAWFORD, Texas (AP) - The temperature topped 100, sweaty degrees at President Bush's ranch on Wednesday - a fine day for a three-mile run.

Forty White House staffers, members of the military and Secret Service gathered at a starting line and took off running. Their secret hope was to be inducted into the ``President's 100-degree Club.''

``You have to run for three miles. No walking. And then you get a T-shirt,'' White House deputy press secretary Dana Perino said about the event, which has become an August tradition at the ranch.

Idiots. The whole lot of them.

The president gave the runners a pep talk at the starting point of the midafternoon run - two laps on a paved road that winds near a helicopter landing zone. ``He told them not to push it too hard, but to give it their all,'' she said.

Bush cheered them on at the halfway point and then rode in his pickup truck back to the finish line in time to shake hands with every runner and present each with a light blue T-shirt emblazoned with: ``The President's 100 Degree Club.''


After his morning briefings, he cut down a few trees and took a spin on his bicycle. Earlier in the week, he worked outside building mountain bike trails.

``I would expect that there would be some brush cutting to do,'' Perino said. ``I don't know how many people are going to be able to stand it. The president, obviously, likes the heat, so maybe everyone else is just going to have to suffer through it.''

Hey, staffers!

Bush is not Jesus, and you're not apostles.

Get out of the Texas heat, dumbasses!

Best bar bet in the world: Delilah didn't do it.
Judges 16:19--


Blogger The Subversive Librarian said...

Geez. That had better be one nice T-shirt.

8:08 AM  

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