Osama Bin Icicle: So What?

If you have a capital R after your name, you're in big mid-term election trouble right now. Your constituents, your local newspapers, and those pesky internet bloggers are hot on your heels, you Heels.

What's the best October Surprise you could think of? One that would divert the entire country's attention long enough for your buddies to Diebold yet another election in your favor?

Finding Osama, of course.

But the timing would have to be just right. Too early, and voters might move on and refocus on your sorry-assed record. Too late, and voters might question the timing of finally finding a 6'4" guy with an entourage in a region where 5'9" is considered tall.

(Cue The Cat Leaving The Bag!)

French Foreign Intelligence Document Claims Bin Laden is Dead

23 September 2006 | 11:35 | FOCUS News Agency Paris.

A document of the French Foreign Intelligence Service (DGSE), cited by the l'Est Républicain claims that the Saudi secret services had proves that Al Qaeda leader Osama Bin Laden was dead, Reuters reports.
More details were expected from Riad so that they could spread the news. The French authorities refuse to comment on the news but last week the Chief of French Armed Forces said he was not sure whether Osama Bin Laden was alive. According to the information of the Saudi services Bin Laden had died on August 23rd from typhus while in Pakistan. The French intelligence thought the information was quite reliable and that was why they had sent it to the President, the Prime Minister and the ministers of interior and defense, the publication points out.

If this report turns out to be true...

So what?

Bush has famously said that he doesn't even think about Bin Laden anymore. Bush even disbanded the Bin Laden search unit (but Dems forced its reinstatement).

"Finding" Osama Bin Icicle won't stop the daily deaths of our soldiers, will it?

Or the 1.8 Billion dollar weekly war bill.

Or the Bush administration's "Torture Is good" policy.

Or the sleazy doings of your local Republican lawmakers.

So don't be seduced by Republicans who'll claim total victory in the war on terror (but won't bring our troops home) when and if Osama Bin Icicle's body is produced for your viewing pleasure 24/7 on MSNBC and the other cable news networks... complete with its own graphics and theme music.

Instead, you should ask:

What took you so damned long?

Best bar bet in the world: Delilah didn't do it.
Judges 16:19-- And she made him (Samson) sleep upon her knees; and she called for a man, and she caused him to shave off the seven locks of his head.