Today's Sermon: Definitions

Many of us who had assigned seats at mandatory Chapel sessions each Wednesday morning (as undergrads) would have learned much from this lesson:

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! don't do it!" "Why shouldn't I?" he said. I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!" He said, "Like what?" I said, "Well...are you religious or atheist?" He said, "Religious." I said, "Me too! Are you christian or buddhist?" He said, "Christian." I said, "Me too! Are you catholic or protestant?" He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me too! Are you episcopalian or baptist?" He said, "Baptist!" I said,"Wow! Me too! Are you baptist church of god or baptist church of the lord?" He said, "Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you original baptist church of god, or are you reformed baptist church of god?" He said,"Reformed Baptist church of god!" I said, "Me too! Are you reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1879, or reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915?" He said, "Reformed baptist church of god, reformation of 1915!" I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off.-- Emo Phillips

Thus Endeth Today's Sermon.


Go forth knowing that definitions of words like God, Freedom, and Security are subjective...

Even among like minded-peoples.

And never ever assume that the self-proclaimed righteous have your best interests at heart.

I mean it, damn it!



File this under: Sheep amidst the wolves